Sunday, January 25, 2009

I dont sleep. Last night I laid 7 beautiful sick little people in my bed and it hit me like a brick. THEY NEED A MOM. My initial response was, of course: OK. I can do that.

And then I thought about it. Whoa. Uh oh. Oh, God, please don’t ask me to be their mom. I mean, really? If having 11 children is crazy, what is having 18? Nope, I can’t do it. Really. I even don’t think I have the energy to bathe and feed them all every day God. I won’t be able to put them through college, not even in Uganda. God, now I’m seriously never going to convince anyone to marry me. Ah, yes, I would like to sit here and proclaim to you that I ALWAYS trust in God’s perfect plan for my life and I always turn everything over to God knowing that His peace surpasses all understanding, but here is the truth of it: I FREAKED OUT. I said “God, if you ask me to be their mom, I won’t do it. No.” And then that didn’t feel very appreciative of someone who died for me, so I said “Ok God, if you want me to be their mom, I want a dishwasher. Oh, AND a bus.” After about an hour of this conversation (Yes, it was happening out loud as I lay on the floor next to my bed) I came to my senses and decided to get in the Word (duh.) And please just let me share with you what God said to me…

“It’s ok to be human. I created you, I understand. Do not be afraid; do not be terrified. I am the Lord your God and I will go with you wherever you go. I will never leave or forsake you (Deuteronomy 31:6). Remember that I said you would be hard pressed on every side, but never crushed; perplexed but not in despair, persecuted but never abandoned, discouraged but never destroyed. (2 Corinthians 4:8-9). When you try to save your own life, your own desires, you will lose. But when you decide to put aside your desires, to lose your life for me, you will find it. (Matthew 16:25). Rest in my perfect peace. Trust me with ALL YOUR HEART and I will direct your path (Proverbs 3:5-6). Sometimes I test your faith daughter, because it develops perseverance in you, which you need to be mature and complete, not lacking in anything (James 1:2-4). I know how much you hurt for these children; I hurt for them more. In the world you will have trouble, but take heart! I HAVE OVERCOME THE WORLD (John 16:33). Never be lacking in zeal but keep your spiritual fervor serving me, your Father. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, and faithful in prayer. Continue to offer my hospitality to people in need and let me take care of the rest (Romans 12:11-13)

Of course. According to Suzanne who called after a few very frantic text messages (THANK THE LORD FOR SISTERS!), it’s ok to freak out every now and then, but this is all a little funny. (Hm. Tell me that when seven strangers are sleeping in your bed). But she reminded me that really, I am sure that God was laughing too. “I will not leave you as orphans (REMEMBER!) I am coming to you!” And you know what I remembered? I trust in God’s perfect plan and my heart so desires to turn everything over to God knowing that His peace surpasses all understanding. Imagine that.

Today the freaking out is over and though I still have no idea exactly what is going to happen, I do know what I am going to do. I am going to live day by day because today, this moment, is all I am promised. So I am going to bathe and feed and love these children, nurse them back to health and wait in hope as I watch God's perfect plan for their lives unfold. I am going to PRAY over them each night and I am going to pray for a mother, an auntie, someone to love on the children. Pray with me? Their names are Maria, Sharon, Sarah, Joy, Joanne, Jonah, Jane. And God will not leave them as orphans.

32 comments:

suzanne mayernick said...

i am so proud of you! i worked on all the sponsors from CPA yday, and with each entry my heart was filled more and more with joy! we are praying fervently for the new lil ones. I am so glad that your heart is complete now. perhaps we should bring some more dvd's when we come!! haha i can't wait to see your sweet face. Gwen and I miss you sooooo much, but are so proud that you are there with your kiddos.

Mike Mayernick said...

Wow. I have had what i consider a pretty "miserable" cold the last several days but right now as I sip my hot coffee and think of these kids.....perspective comes to me. Glad you are home now. We will lift all of you up in prayer. I know this is a shocker, but this would be my first EVER blog. We grow more excited by the day as we look forward to our visit!

Auntie Amanda said...

Oh, Katie. You dont know how much I needed to read these words... and I have a feeling I will be re-reading them much over the next little bit.
Your beautiful, submissive, and patient heart is really an inspiration. And now that I've gotten to see Bukaya and a taste of what it is like, I feel that in blogs like this maybe I can reach through and be right in your living room again, seeing those beautiful faces...imagining these 7 new ones. I'll share with you in spirit, and be praying much.

Ron and Dinia said...

I thought I had my wagon full this week and then I read your post. I think the best part of my week was getting the photo and note from Hanifa. Is it possible to reply to Hanifa?

We are praying for you!

Oatsvall Team said...

well, you know i am i tears here just watching God grow you and all of us through you ... I am so proud to stand beside and Suzanne is so right, WE MISS YOU SO SO SO MUCH and we honor the fact that you are you are exactly right where you are suppose to be ...

I will print the precious little ones names for our prayer board !!

I will read this post daily until those children are home and be reminded that God has it all under control !!!!

Love You ... Plus I got two emails of people wanting to sponsor children, so will take care of that and know God will provide everything !!!

momonamisson said...

I sit in awe of how He is working in your life. God is great. I would love to follow your blog how do I do that?
God Blesss you and your family.

Diane said...

Okay:)

As a Mama to only five:) One thing I've learned is night time is the hardest time, at least for me. I look at what I still have to accomplish, or, I think I have to accomplish, and, I think about what I did not accomplish, but, God tells us come to Me all who are weary and I will give your rest. Accept His rest in the evening. He will cover you and His children. He will move you forward into the next day. You have so go it right, Katie....moment at a time. When your children are sleeping/resting try to fall into God's arms for your sweet peace and rest. He wants you rested for the next task He is preparing for you.

It will be with JOY that I will remember to pray for all the children. But, the "J" names should be very, very east:)

Diane..Mama to Joe, Jen, Jana Mei, Jadyn Hua and JOY Hua !!!!!

Laurel said...

Praying for you!

And ... I believe that God will bring you an amazing husband, that will also love all of those precious little ones.


Laurel
mama of 13

Double Dubbin said...

Wow! Katie--reading this just gave me chills. I just met this amazing girl on Friday of this past week that is one of 19...so when I was reading your blog today I was thinking, NOTHING is too big for GOD!

Bless you, dear sister, as you are such an encouragement to those of us who read how you're following the Lord with all your heart...and really taking Him at His WORD!

This is such an encouragement to me...

redeemedintohope said...

you are not in this alone sweet sister. Your Father leads you, your sisters walk beside you, we are praying, trusting, asking, and following our Christ. I am proud of you- of your surrendered spirit to the King. Continue walking in that and know that I am here standing with you, ali

Melissa said...

Katie, Thanks for sharing so honestly. I am blessed by the work you do and your heart.

I was hoping I could ask you about a foundation in Jinja if that's ok. Would you email me:hismissionmine@yahoo.com

Thanks!
Melissa Lorenz

The Ferrill's said...

Wow Wow Wow. Katie I am praying for you...I know this doesn't sound profound or anything, but you ROCK! I mean--JESUS ROCKS!!!!!!!!!!
I really needed to read your post tonight...Sun, Jan. 25th. No mistake. God's timing is always perfect.
I wish I could do something like come and help you with those children. I myself have seven little lovins!
I will just continue to pray and follow the Lord's lead...
Blessings to you from Dixieland USA.
LOVE YALL!!!!!!!!!!

andrea said...

oh my soul..i am so inspired by you and your beautiful children!
I had been reading gwen's blog and she encouraged me to read your story!

wow..may God richly bless you as you carry on His work!

JAMIE said...

Hey Katie.... I just want you to know that i am praying with and for you. I just rad your blog and it really moved me!! I began tearing up as i prayed for you and your kids. If there is anything i can do just lt me know and i will try my best to help. Also, i am looking for a place to volunteer this summer. I am lookin at coming to Africa for a couple of weeks, maybe three. If you know of a place or if i can help you let me know. Well Katie you take care and put all your faith in Christ and He will provide.
I will continue to pray for you and your children. Let me know if you ned anything.
Love, your brother in Christ,

Jamie

Rachel and Arielle said...

Katie, you're so great! Please eat a big bowl of beans for me! Give your children and all the children of UG love from me. Jesus is beaming at you right now!

Love,
Rachel

drea said...

Wow!! My heart overflows, my tears overflow, I am a mess, a good one though. Praise God for your obediance. I know that you are right where you are supposed to be. Loving the unloved, touching the untouchable. Living as the hands and feet of Christ, what a privilege!!

I will pray with you, as we have been praying together.You my friend, are in the center of Gods will, no better place. Oh, and you won't have do the convincing the Lord will do that, besides, what more could a man ask for, a woman totaly abandoned to serving God!

I am so blessed with my new friend, keep the blogs comming.

Tuerff Family said...

Kaite,

I thank you for who you are and praise God for you. Your Blog means so much to me. Your strength in and faith in God grows me every day. Know I will pray for these children.

Jayne Tuerff

Anonymous said...

Wow how amazing is the Word. You are obviously an excellent swordsmen. I am so blessed to hear of your "mission" and inclined to pray for you and the littles in your care. Although we have never met you are my dear sister in Christ and I will remember you in my prayers as you are the hands and feet to a hard place. Please let us know of any tangible needs you have and can discern.
Laura Frost
Hendersonville, TN

Mark and Jimmy said...

We are so blessed to be part of your life and watch you grow and be shaped for His purpose. Watching you grows me. 7 is such a perfect number and I know God is perfecting you for much bigger things. Bigger then what appears to be too much now. Our 11 year old son just had a growth spurt. As I was thinking about your spiritual growth I realized that each time Nash has a bad night of growing pains, he wakes up to be a bigger young man. We are with you in prayer. Jim Mihnovich

Brandi said...

Precious friend. . I LOVE reading this. . and I truly love reading all of these comments and standing in awe of what God has done to make Himself known through Amazima (see I can write it even if I can't pronounce it!)

I love you. I pray God's sweet, supernatural rest and rejevenation for you each night that you may awake to do His bidding. I know that you are keeping your eyes fixed on Jesus and I will keep praying just that for you as I know the enemy is trying desparately to distract! I can't wait to meet these 7 precious ones. I pray for God's sweet discernment to give you wisdom. I also pray for you as you wait on HIS timing to reveal parts of His story for these little ones. Love on them for us. Tell them the stories of people all across America who are lifting them to Jesus.

We may not be able to stay up late tonight dreaming and writing. . but we can sit next to each other in the throne room. Love you much and can't wait to get there!

Brandi
PS Send me your number. . I may just have to get a calling card! Did you ever get skype hooked up? Yeah, this should have been an email instead of a long comment!

Susan said...

It brings me such joy to read your posts. Isn't it funny about wrestling with God.....He always wins. :) Thank you for sharing your heart, your journey, and most of all, thank you for the opportunity you give us to support your ministry and the beautiful children in it.

Tina Fleetwood said...

You don't know me - I happened upon your blog accidentally(?). You inspire me, you challenge me, you make me want to DO! Many, many blessings, Tina Fleetwood

Grandma Joyce said...

Katie, I'll be praying for Maria,Sharon,Sarah,Joy, Joanne, Jonah & JANE. I'll continue to pray for you that you'll stay well & be able to care for he chldren.
Love you,
Grandma

Anonymous said...

Hi Katie, as an 18 year old girl who is longing to help God's precious children, reading your blogs was such an encouragement to me. It brought tears to my eyes as I was reminded of 1 Tim. 4:12-"Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith, and in purity." You set that example and have encouraged me tremendously. As a young person, I may not have much funds to help, but my prayers are with you. And if there is ANYTHING more I can do to help, I would love to! My heart goes out to and longs to help those orphans. May God bless you as you bless them!!!

Kami Gordon, Cedarville University
email: kamidanae08@yahoo.com

gloria said...

May God bless you katie for what you are doing for His children - and yes He does place the solitary in families and He is the FAther of the fatherless.... Ps. 68.....

Blessings,
gloria
adoptive mama to 5

Lexie said...

I have been wanting to comment for some time now...but thought it would be weird for me, a total stranger, to comment! But, here I am! I don't know how I stumbled upon your blog...but I absolutely love it! As a 16 year old you inspire me so much. Reading your posts brings me such joy! Some day (hopefully soon!) I want to go out into the world and share Gods love with sweet children like yours. I am just waiting for God to open some doors! But, until then...I am soaking up every word/story you have to tell! Keep loving on those beautiful children!
Blessings to you in Africa!
Lexie

The Hebert Family said...

i am so happy you are back with your sweet children. i love reading your post and you still just amaze me. i will keep you and your girls in my prayers. i so glad i got to meet you while you were home. take care. angie

Mama2Many said...

God Bless you beautiful young Woman of God!

I was just directed to your site and I am so challenged & inspired by you and your journey. I have just written about you and your kids on my own web journal and joined your cause on F/B. Let's see if we can't raise you some more awareness and support!
Blessings,
Regina

Alea said...

Katie I am so amazed by all that you are doing in Uganda and I wish I could come back and help you! I would really love to help you with your school from the states though. Elise said she is sponsoring a couple of kids at your school and I would love to do the same! Let me know what I can do for you and how I can sponsor someone for your school!!! P.S. you're amazing :) and I watched our Nile rafting video recently and relived my panic and fear and it was terrible. And there you were with a huge smile on your face... hehe

Anonymous said...

Thinking of you, Katie and praying for God's provision, protection and purposes to be fulfilled in you as you love on his children! A lady in my small group in Bible study and I had this enthusiastic discussion about you yesterday and agreed that your compelling story draws others to want to help and be involved.May he sustain you with His strength to do His work. And don't forget to sleep! :) Much love and blessing to you! Renee

Dawn said...

Thank you for what you doing. I sit here in China doing "m" work and have all the amenities you don't have. How can I call myself the same thing? You are laying it all down for Him. May you continue to lead your girls in His ways and may you see the fruit of that again and again in them as they take in and love the orphans. I love your story. Thank you for living it and then telling it for all to see. May it inspire others to lay it all down for Him.

Jewels of My Heart said...

With each post I am drawn closer.... closer to these precious children sleeping in your bed.... closer to our Jesus who loves us unconditionally....
closer to the calling the Lord has placed in my heart for my family.....
You remind me that God can do it! He can provide the means to bring my other children home who are waiting for me in China and Africa. He can provide the direction, the means and equip my family to serve Him in the mission field. I must keep my eyes fixed upon Jesus!
I will be praying for you and for these little ones..... I hope as I read and catch up you will have shared happy news that they are with their family.... whether that is with you or someone else.
God bless the children.